A couple of weeks ago, I got to deliver my new Stress, Guts and the Frazzled Modern Woman talk to approximately 50 women. My stuffed frog, François, heard it about 75 times leading up to the event. (He’s lived on my desk since 4th grade.) Yet, it was the first time that I got to hear women supporting other women (with hugs!) and use my voice again after being quiet for many months. It was also the first time I decided that public-speaking probably wasn’t going to be the thing to kill me and didn’t lose 1-2 nights of sleep leading up to the event.
You see using my voice again in that way was a big coming-out for me. Because right next to those vocal cords lives a very beat-up thyroid. For those of you who don’t recall, I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s, or chronic autoimmune thyroiditis, last October. While some days, it’s frustrating to deal with these phantasmagoric symptoms, it’s also a gift. In a way, it’s been like bumper-rails at a bowling alley keeping me focused on what I need to and allowing me to dismiss the bullshizzle. Needless to say, I’m learning a lot.
That said, I want to share this journey with you as it unfolds. Why? As I stood in front of those 50 women a few weeks ago, I talked about the mega-shame I silently carried about having IBS in my 20s. I carried that shame for close to a decade…long past the time I healed, long past the time I apprenticed and went back to school and even into the first year or so of starting my practice…because I’d rather have talked about anything besides admitting my irritable bowels got the best of me in public. Yet, all of the lessons learned also never saw the light of day.
I won't make that mistake twice.
One glitch. You know that I’m a recovering perfectionist, right? The idea of sharing the unfinished case study that is my immune system right now nearly bumps me out of recovery. It’s scary. There no neat bow tied around it! I’m not a medical doctor! (I am seeing an integrative one, though.) My name is not Nancy Drew, Scooby Do or any other sleuth you know! I’ve never been a consistent blogger! I might get sh*t wrong in front of people like you who pop by my blog! My insatiable curiosity might lead me down a rabbit hole of missteps! Or I might get some things right; and we might all just learn something that we haven’t even considered yet.
Just remember: You're on the journey with me and my body. This isn't a prescription or a protocol, but an excuse to think critically about health and self-advocacy. So, put your health detective hat on with me.